You know what’s cool? Astronauts. And a lot of other things too. Like rockets and moon and things from NASA. You know what else is cool? Aliens. But that’s not the point. The point is, if you’re into space then you’re going to like these jokes.
Astronaut jokes are a fun way to bring out the kid in everybody. Whether you’re an astronaut yourself or just want to learn about space travel, these are the type of jokes that can entertain your friends. They’re perfect to share at parties, social gatherings, and around the office.
Lets start
Astronaut Jokes
Why did the astronaut bring a ladder into space? Because he wanted to reach for the stars.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on gum on the moon? He got stuck in orbit.
What do you call an astronaut’s favorite music? Nep-tunes.
Why did the astronaut become a baker? Because he wanted to make some space cakes.
How do astronauts serve dinner in space? On flying saucers.
What do you call an astronaut who’s really good at math? A rocket scientist.
How do astronauts throw a party? The planet in advance.
Did you hear about the astronaut who went to a restaurant on the moon? The food was out of this world.
Why don’t astronauts get hungry in space? Because they just eat their Milky Way.
Why was the astronaut always calm? Because he knew how to keep a cool head in zero gravity.
How do astronauts watch their favorite TV shows? They use remote “space”trols.
What do you call it when two astronauts get married? An out-of-this-world wedding.
Why did the astronaut break into song on the spaceship? He couldn’t resist a stellar performance.
What do astronauts wear to stay warm? Apollo sweatshirts.
How do astronauts communicate with each other in space? They just “space-time” each other.
What kind of music do astronauts listen to? Nep-tunes.
Why did the astronaut become a pastry chef? Because he wanted to make space cakes.
How do astronauts organize a party? They planet.
What do you call an astronaut who sleeps on the job? A space snoozer.
Why was the math book sad when it met an astronaut? Because it had too many problems.
Astronaut One-Liners
Being an astronaut is out of this world.
The universe is vast, but an astronaut’s potential is infinite.
Astronauts have the best view of Earth — from space.
In space, no one can hear you yawn.
An astronaut’s favorite movie must be Gravity.
It’s not rocket science, oh wait, actually, it is.
Nothing beats the feeling of weightlessness, especially after leg day at the gym.
Astronauts don’t just explore space, they explore the limits of human potential.
Going to space is the ultimate field trip.
Who needs wings when you can explore the universe from a spaceship?
Astronauts always reach for the stars.
Space travel: the only way to escape all your earthly problems.
Lift-off: the ultimate adrenaline rush.
An astronaut’s to-do list: explore, discover, and repeat.
Astronauts have what it takes to shoot for the moon and land beyond.
Astronauts don’t let anything hold them down, not even gravity.
It takes a lot of fuel to propel an astronaut’s determination and courage.
An astronaut’s mindset is truly out of this world.
Two things astronauts always remember: never give up and always look up.
In space, no one can hear you scream, but they can hear you cheering for more adventures.
Astronaut Pick-Up Lines
Are you a shooting star? Because I can’t take my eyes off you.
Do you believe in love at first spacewalk, or should I float by again?
Is your name Apollo? Because you light up my world.
If you were a planet, you’d definitely be a hot one.
Are we in zero gravity? Because whenever I’m with you, I feel weightless.
You must be a supernova, because you just exploded into my universe.
I must be a moon rock, because you’re the reason I’m falling for you.
Is your name Mercury? Because you make my temperature rise.
You must be a star, because you’ve brightened up my night.
Are you a satellite? Because I can’t stop orbiting around you.
Do you believe in love across the galaxy, or should I warp drive to your heart?
Is your name Hubble? Because you make everything in my world clearer.
Are you made up of dark matter? Because you’re mysterious and irresistible.
I must be an astronaut, because you take my breath away.
Is your name Sputnik? Because you’re the reason I’m spinning around.
Are you a phase of the moon? Because you light up my darkest nights.
If you were a meteor shower, I’d wish upon you every time.
You must be a constellation, because I find myself getting lost in your eyes.
Is your name Mars? Because I’m drawn to you like the red planet.
Are you a space probe? Because you’ve discovered new dimensions in my heart.
Short Astronaut Jokes
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend? He needed his space.
What do you call an astronaut who’s afraid to go outside? A chicken cosmonaut.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on gum? He got stuck in orbit.
Why did the astronaut bring a pack of cards into space? In case he met the Martian Queen.
Why didn’t the astronaut come back to earth on time? He lost his Apollo-gies.
Did you hear about the astronaut who broke his hand during space training? He had to call a wrist-tar rescue team.
How do astronauts stay organized? They planet ahead of time.
What did the alien say to the astronaut? “I love your suit, it’s out of this world.”
How do you know if someone is an astronaut? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you at launch.
Why was the astronaut afraid of returning to earth? He heard it was a little down-to-earth.
How do astronauts get their mail? By using a flying space envelope.
What do you call an astronaut’s favorite sandwich? A launch-pad thai.
Why didn’t the astronaut study for his astrophysics exam? He thought it was one giant leap of faith.
What does an astronaut use to keep up his hygiene in space? A shuttle brush and Comet toothpaste.
How do you invite an astronaut to dinner? You planet ahead.
Why do astronauts break their bread before eating it in space? Because there is no gravity to cut it.
What do you call an astronaut who doesn’t believe in astrology? Reason-able.
What do you call it when two astronauts collide? An astro-not.
Why did the astronaut wear a belt? He didn’t want his pants to launch into orbit.
What did the astronaut say when he found out he was going to space? “I’m over the moon.”