Athletic puns are a dime a dozen when it comes to writing for the internet, there’s no question about that.
But have you ever felt that you were deprived of funny puns that are relevant for the sports world? Do you find yourself keeping track of your protein intake in order to live your best possible life? Or have you just been craving some more athleticism in your puns from time to time?
Exercise your pun skills as you enjoy this collection of funny athletic puns.
Athletics Puns
Why was the sprinter so cold? Because he left his warm-up on the track.
Did you hear about the runner who lost his shoes? He was soleless.
How does a pitcher become a successful criminal? They master the art of throwing curve-balls.
Did you hear about the gymnast who opened a bakery? She makes flipping-tasty cakes.
How do you keep a tennis court clean? You sweep it with a volley.
What does a basketball player say when they get a haircut? They hoop it’s a good one.
Why did the long-jumper break up with their partner? They wanted to see other people.
Why did the soccer player break up with their significant other? They kept dribbling on about nothing.
Have you heard the joke about the high-jumper? It’s over their head.
Why did the runner stop hanging out with their old friends? They were bad influences, always setting a bad pace.
What’s a hurdler’s favorite drink? Hurdleberry Juice.
How does a runner stop their socks from slipping? They use sock-a-blockers.
What did the relay team say to their baton? We’ll never let you down.
Did you hear about the baseball team that started a band? They thought it would be a home run.
Why did the volleyball team go to the library? They wanted to learn about the setting.
Athletics Puns
Why did the coach take the team to the bank? To get their dollar hurdles.
Why did the sprinter wear sunglasses? Because they wanted to keep an eye on their competition.
How do runners stay cool? They sweat-er it out.
What did the high jumper say to their friend who didn’t believe they could clear the height? Jump to it and see for yourself.
How do runners keep their shoes clean? They track and field the mud off.
Did you hear about the athlete who broke the world record for the longest long jump? They jumped to new heights.
Why did the athlete refuse to wear running shoes? Because they preferred soleless running.
What do you call an athlete who’s always on their phone? A sprint-er texter.
How does the shot put athlete deal with their stress? They put their worries into the ground.
What did the discus say when the athlete threw it too far? “Let’s give that one a spin.”
Did you hear about the pole vaulter who couldn’t clear the height? They just couldn’t seem to stick the landing.
Why did the cross-country runner run across the road? To get to the other far side.
What do you call a group of athletes that keep getting faster together? A relay-tionship.
Why did the track team go on a hiking trip? They wanted to enjoy some cross-training.
What did the marathoner say after the race? “I’m feeling wheely tired.”
Athletes Pick-Up Lines
“Are you a sprinter? Because you’ve got my heart racing!
“Are you a high jumper? Because you’ve definitely reached new heights in my eyes.
“Do you believe in love at first serve? Because you just aced my heart.”
“Are you a long-distance runner? Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.”
“Do you play soccer? Because you’re a goal-keeper of my heart.”
“Are you a gymnast? Because you effortlessly flip my world upside down.”
“Do you pole vault? Because you’ve vaulted straight into my heart.”
“Are you a shooting guard? Because you’ve really stolen my attention.”
“Do you play tennis? Because you’ve scored an ace in capturing my interest.”
“Are you a swimmer? Because when I look at you, I’m completely breathless.”