Ducks are the feathered comedians of the animal kingdom! They waddle like runway models with webbed feet, quacking their way to fame.
They’re natural “quack-titioners” of synchronized swimming, making us humans look like clueless amateurs.
Get ready to be quackers with laughter as we dive into 100 hilarious duck jokes that will make you quack up! Let’s waddle right in.
Duck Puns
Why don’t ducks tell jokes while they’re flying? Because they might quack up.
What did one duck say to the other when they bumped into each other? “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so ‘bill-igerent.'”
How do ducks deposit their money? They put it in their “quack-count.”
What do you call a duck that steals? A “robber ducky.”
How do ducks watch TV shows? With their “webbed” feet up.
What type of music do ducks listen to? “Quack and roll.”
Why did the duck bring a ladder to the pond? It wanted to “reach new heights.”
What did the duck say after finishing a delicious meal? “That was ‘beak-licious.'”
Why did the duck bring an umbrella to the party? In case there was “fowl” weather.
What do you call a duck that likes to play hide-and-seek? A “quack-teur.”
How do ducks express their emotions? They “quack” up.
What kind of makeup do ducks wear? “Mascara-quack.”
Why don’t ducks like talking on the phone? Because they prefer “face-to-face” conversations.
What did the duck say when it won the race? “I’m the ‘quack-ing’ champion.”
How do you become friends with a duck? Just “wing it.”
Why did the duck cross the road using the zebra crossing? It wanted to “blend in” with the other animals.
What’s a duck’s favorite type of basketball game? “Dunk-a-duck.”
What did the duck say after finishing a tough workout? “I’m so ‘feathered’ but proud.”
How does a duck end a phone conversation? “Quack soon, bye.”
Why did the duck purchase a new computer? To “surf the web.
What do you call a duck that steals cleaning supplies? A “feather duster.”
Why did the duck go to school? It wanted to become a “wise quacker.”
How do ducks stay up-to-date with the latest news? They read “pond-erful” articles.
What do you call a duck that loves to travel? An “ad-ven-duck.”
Why did the duck join the circus? It wanted to be the “quack-trobat.”
How does a duck make a call on a phone? It dials with its “quacks.”
What did the duck say when it was asked about its favorite book? “I’m currently reading ‘feathery’ tales.”
Why do ducks never tell secrets? They’re afraid of getting “quacked.”
What do you call a duck that loves putting on shows? A “quacktress.”
How do you start a conversation with a shy duck? You “break the ice” and say, “Don’t be so ‘beak-ward.’
Duck Pick-Up Lines
“Are you a duck? Because you quack me up.”
“Do you believe in love at first “quack”?”
Is it just me, or are we in a “pond” of chemistry?
“You must be a beautiful swan, because I’m feeling “ducky” around you!”
“Can I borrow your wing? I want to show my friends that angels really do exist.”
“If you were a duck, you’d be a “quack-tacular” one.”
“Are you a duckling? Because you make my heart “melt”.”
“Do you believe in destiny? Because I think we were “flock”ing meant to be.”
Can I take you out for a romantic “waddle” under the moonlight?
“If I were a duck, I’d swim a thousand kilometers just to be by your side.”
I may not be a magician, but whenever I’m with you, everything becomes “duckily” delightful.
“Are you a duck? Because you’ve “wing-ed” your way into my heart.”
“Do you have a map? I keep getting “lost” in your eyes.
“Can I follow you home? My mother always told me to “duck” to handsome strangers.
“Do you have a name or can I “quack” you up one?”
“Is your name Feather? Because you’ve made my heart “flock” in excitement.”
Are you a shooting star? Because every time I see you, I make a wish for us to be “together-ducks”.”
“Do you have a band-aid? Because I just “fell in love” with you.”
“Are you a duck? Because I find you utterly “feather-taining”.”
“Do you believe in soulmates? Because I think you and I are “mate-for-duck”.”
“Excuse me, can you help me find a “quack-rantined” place in your heart?”
“Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see my future with you reflected in your eyes.”
“Is it a duck pond or is it just me? Because whenever you’re around, everything feels more “quack-tastic”.”
“Did it hurt when you fell from the sky? Because you’ve “beak-on” my heart.”
“Are you a duck? Because my heart is “flapping” like crazy around you.”
“Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I quack by again?”
Are you a “pond-erful” magnet? Because each time we’re near, I’m drawn to you.”
“Do you have a sunflower? Because you bring sunshine into my “quack-ing” existence.
“Are you a duck? Because you make my heart go “quack-a-doodle-doo”.”
“Can I take you on a picnic? Because you and I are the perfect “quack-nic”.”
Duck One-Liners
Ducks always fly in a “quack-tacular” formation.
Duck detectives never leave a case “feather-pended”.
Why did the duck borrow money? Because it needed to “bill” a new nest.
Ducks never worry about taking a leap – they just “wing” it.
The duck bartender always provides “excellent quack-tails”.
Did you hear about the duck that became a comedian? It had everyone in “stitches”.
Ducks love music because it gets their “webbed” feet tapping.
The duck piano tuner is outstanding – a true “meloduck”.
Why did the duck refuse to fly south? It didn’t want to be a “quitter”.
Ducks always make sure to “splash” on their sunscreen before hitting the pond.
Did you know ducks love to watch action movies? It’s all about the “quack-tion”.
The duck chef’s specialty is creating dishes that are “beak-licious.
If you ever need someone to “quack” you up, call a duck comedian.
Ducks don’t need fancy cars – their preferred ride is a “quackmobile.
Duck football games always end in a “quackdown!
Why don’t ducks like sharing their snacks? Because they’re “quack-torias”.
Ducks are experts at finding solutions, they’re always “solvingquackers”.
What did the duck say to the comedian? “You’re truly “feathertaining”.
Ducks never worry about bad hair days – they always look “plumage-ous.
If you’re ever feeling down, just remember that ducks always have a “quackerjack” attitude.
Did you hear about the duck that won a race? It was a “quack-ing” victory.
Why did the duck join a band? It wanted to “quack” some catchy tunes.
Ducks love picnics because they get to “bill” and “coo” under the sun.
The duck scientist never stops “quack-sperimenting.
Ducks always know how to make a splash at parties – they’re natural “quack-ers”.
Why don’t ducks watch scary movies? They don’t want to get “feather-frighted”.
Did you hear about the duck that started a fashion trend? It became a “beak-on” of style.
Ducks are incredible gardeners – they have a “quack” for growing beautiful flowers.
Remember, even a single “quack” can brighten someone’s day.
Ducks love puns because they’re always looking for a good “quack-up”.
Duck Puns
“I’m feeling a bit down, but I’ll just “duck-ide” to quack a smile.”
“Did you hear about the duck that became a lawyer? It was a “quack-titioner”.”
“I asked the duck what its favorite shape was. It replied, ‘I’m a fan of anything “quack-tangular”.'”
“Why did the duck bring an umbrella? In case of “fowl” weather.”
“What’s a duck’s favorite TV show? “Beak-ing Bad”.
“I saw a duck wearing a crown. Turns out it was a “quack-monarch”.”
“Why did the duck always carry a map? It didn’t want to “wing” it on its travels.”
“What’s a duck’s favorite vegetable? “Quack-a-mole”.”
“Why did the duck go to acting school? It wanted to “quack” an impressive performance.”
“Why did the duck go to the bank? It needed some “duckets” for its bills.”