30 Martial Arts Jokes

Martial arts jokes are a fun way to discover the light-hearted side of martial arts including legendary masters, secret techniques, and curious students.

If you’ve been to an MMA, kickboxing, karate or taekwondo school, there is nothing that can compare to learning martial arts with your friends. Mastering throws, punches and kicks can be a lot of fun and provide you with hours of laughter. Martial arts jokes are a great way to break the ice in your dojo while having a good time.

Between the Tinder-swipe-joke-level wittiness, we do find a few good ones which can brighten up our day and leave us chuckling. Here are 30 martial arts jokes.

Martial Arts Jokes

Did you hear about the Martial Arts instructor who opened a bakery? His specialty was breaking bread.

How did the Martial Artist quit smoking? He broke the habit with a roundhouse kick.

Why did the Martial Artist bring a ladder to the fight? Because he wanted to kick higher than anyone else.

Did you know that Martial Artists are great at math? They can always count on their hands and feet.

How do Martial Artists say goodbye? They bow out gracefully.

Why did the Martial Artist bring his dog to the dojo? He wanted to master the art of paw-to-paw combat.

What did the Martial Artist say when he crushed his opponent? “You just got served!”

Why did the Martial Artist stay away from the bakery? He didn’t want to get a gluten-free blow.

How to do Martial Artists like their coffee? They prefer it with a lot of punches and kicks.

What did one Martial Artist say to the other during a spar? “I’m kickin’ it into high gear!”

How did the Martial Artist make friends? He just threw a punchline.

What did one Martial Artist say to the other after a tough training session? “We really kicked butt today!”

What do you call a Martial Artist who becomes a doctor? A surgeon with a high-kick.

How do Martial Artists clean their windows? They use roundhouse Windex.

Who is the laziest Martial Artist? The one who mastered the art of Zen-nap.

Martial Arts Puns

Martial Arts Jokes

The Martial Arts class was on fire, they were really “kick”ing it up a notch!

I told my Martial Arts instructor I was feeling “Kung Fu-zy” and needed some motivation.

When my friend asked me why I started doing Martial Arts, I said it was my “mixed punch-ion.”

I went to a Martial Arts-themed party and had a “roundhouse” of a good time!

The Martial Arts instructor said he couldn’t go on the trip with us because he had a “kata-strophe” at home.

I thought about joining a Martial Arts competition, but I wasn’t “board” with the idea yet.

My Martial Arts instructor told me to “kick back” and relax after a tough training session.

The Martial Arts tournament had to be postponed because the venue had a “mat-ter” with its facilities.

Why did the Martial Artist cross the road? To “strike” up a conversation on the other side!

My Martial Arts teacher said I had a “punch” of talent, but I needed to work on my discipline.

I couldn’t resist making Martial Arts puns; they just “strike” a chord with me.

My friend thought he’d become a Martial Arts master overnight, but I reminded him that it takes “martial years” of practice.

When the Martial Arts instructor showed us a new technique, I thought to myself, “That’s a “kick”-ass move!”

My friend asked me if Martial Arts were difficult, and I replied, “It’s all about finding your “balance.”

The Martial Arts seminar was so inspiring, it gave me a “flying” leap of motivation.

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