Lets start our ninja-inspired pun-tastic extravaganza, where sharp wordplay meets the art of camouflage.
Prepare for a stealthy journey through 60 ninja puns that will have you laughing like a true sensei.
Ninja Puns
Did you hear about the ninja who got a job at the fruit stand? He was the berry best.
My friend took a photo of a ninja and asked me if I thought it was a good picture. I said, “It’s pretty ninjcredible.”
What do you call a ninja who is never on time? Chrono-late.
Did you hear about the ninja who opened a hotel? It had a five-starshuriken rating.
I have a friend who is a ninja baker. His cupcakes are simply swordelicious.
Why don’t ninjas go on vacation in the summer? They prefer the stealth of winter.
Did you hear about the ninja who became a DJ? He always had a fresh mix of shuriken beats.
What do you call a ninja who doesn’t make it to the Battle Royale? A Fortnite-gone conclusion.
Did you hear about the ninja who started a salsa company? It’s called “Ninjarita”.
What is a ninja’s favorite kind of math? Sword-and-shuriken-ometry.
Did you hear about the ninja who invented a new type of drill? It’s called the Ninjabit.
Why did the green ninja blush? Because he saw the red ninja dressing.
What is a ninja’s favorite kind of salad? One with lots of stealthy greens.
Did you hear about the ninja who was always taking photos? He was a shutter-ninja.
What do you call a ninja that’s always running late? A tardi-karate master.
Why did the ninja break up with his girlfriend? She was always throwing star-tantrums.
Did you hear about the ninja who got into a fight with his girlfriend? He ended up throwing a heart-attack.
What is a ninja’s favorite type of coffee? Latte-chops.
Did you hear about the ninja who got a job as a teacher? He was great at sternu-jutsu.
Why did the ninja refuse to honey moon? He was too busy honing his skills.
Best Ninja Jokes
I told my friend the funniest ninja joke last night, but she didn’t laugh. I guess it must have been too stealthy for her.
What did one ninja say to the other ninja on their lunch break? Lettuce katana sushi rolls.
Why did the ninja become a referee? He was really good at making quick and fair calls on the shuriken field.
Did you hear about the ninja who opened a restaurant at the top of a mountain? The view is spectacular, but the food all tastes like altitude sickness.
Why was the ninja scared to go to the beach? He was afraid he might get sand in his shuriken.
Did you hear about the ninja who was always losing things? He searched for hours on end but could never find his back-chuck.
Why did the ninja cross the road? To get to the onigiri on the other side.
How do you make a ninja laugh? Tell him a great sword-of-mouth joke.
Why did the ninja wear blue pajamas? To keep his night-moves sneaky.
Did you hear about the ninja who wrote an autobiography? It was all about his battle with self-doubt and his journey toward true shinobi confidence.
Why did the ninja refuse to throw away his old laptop? It was infected with a deadly katana-virus.
What did the ninja say when he cut the cheese? “It was a silent-but-deadly nin-jarrr.”
Why did the ninja avoid eating fortune cookies? He was afraid of the cookie telling him his true Ninja identity.
Did you hear about the ninja who won the lottery? No one has seen him since he ninja-vanished away with his winnings.
Why did the ninja refuse to go to the gym? He was already in the ultimate shape: shurikening free-weights in his dojo.
Why did the ninja shop at the hardware store? He needed to buy a new pair of Ninja-r scissors.
What did the ninja order for dinner at the sushi restaurant? A blue fin-jitsu tuna roll, of course.
Why did the ninja plant a tree in his backyard? To keep his ninja weapons hidden in plain sight.
Did you hear about the ninja who teamed up with a chef to start a cooking competition? The event was a huge success! But, as always, nobody saw it coming.
Why did the ninja replace his bowling ball with a watermelon? Because he needed a silent-KO shot.
Ninja One-Liners
I asked the ninja if he could lend me a hand. He replied, “I can lend you two, but you’ll have to give them back in one piece.”
I wanted to become a ninja, but I couldn’t find a black belt in laundry folding.
I asked the ninja if he could help me find my missing socks. He said, “I’ll check my ninja pocket dimension.”
When life throws shurikens at you, be the ninja who catches them and throws them right back.
Ninjas make great detectives, they always find a way to solve the case without leaving a trace.
The ninja was disappointed because the library was always too quiet for his liking. He prefers a little more “hi-ya!” in the atmosphere.
I asked the ninja if he had any pets. He said, “Yes, I have a stealthy cat and a silent but deadly goldfish.
My friend started a blog about ninja fitness techniques. It’s called “Shred like a Shadow.
I saw a ninja at the grocery store, but I couldn’t tell which aisle he was in. It was a true case of “where’s Ninja-guy?”
Ninjas never get lost; they just choose to veer off the path of predictability.
I tried to challenge a ninja to a staring contest, but I blinked… and he was gone.
My ninja friend has a part-time job as a mime. He’s the best at stealthy performances.
The ninja chef always cuts his vegetables with the sharpest precision. It’s a work of art you won’t see coming.
My ninja colleague is so dedicated to his craft that he even sleeps in stealth mode. You never see him coming out of bed.
Did you hear about the ninja who fell in love? It was a true case of “love-at-ninjasight.”
My friend tried to sneak up on me like a ninja, but I sensed his presence. He said, “You’ve got some serious ninja-instincts.”
Don’t mess with a ninja’s coffee, or you might just find yourself with a latte-chop to the face.
The ninja watched the sunrise with awe. It reminded him of the beauty that can emerge from the darkest of nights.
Remember to always respect a ninja’s personal space. You never know when they’re just a shadow away.
My ninja neighbor is always running late, but he still manages to arrive just in time to surprise everyone.