A plumber is like a superhero of the sewers, armed with a trusty wrench and a knack for tackling the messiest of situations. They fearlessly dive into the underworld of pipes, battling leaks, clogs, and the occasional rogue rubber ducky.
This list of 80 jokes is here to help. Whether you’re just needing to get a laugh, or you’re trying to help one of your friends kill time at work, this list will save you
Plumber Puns
A good plumber always knows when to stay pipe and when to quit.
The plumber started their own business because they wanted to be flush with cash.
A plumber’s favorite instrument? Pipe-organ.
The plumber’s favorite Olympic sport? Freestyle plumbing.
A plumber’s favorite insect? Drain fly.
The plumber’s idea of a good time? Watching pipes for a leak.
Did you hear about the plumber who retired? They finally had time to tap into all their hobbies.
The plumber’s favorite drink? A piping hot cup of tea.
The plumber’s favorite board game? Pipe-connect four.
Why did the plumber wear glasses? To see pipe-er clearly.
The plumber’s favorite type of music? Drain-pipe.
The rookie plumber had trouble identifying the different types of pipes. They said, “It’s a real drain-brainer.”
A plumber loved their job so much, they got a water droplet tattoo.
The plumber was worried about the economy going down the drain, but then they realized they’d always be in business.
The plumber solved the mystery of the clogged pipes – it was a crime of plumb passion.
The plumber was proud to be part of the pipe-line community.
Plumbers accidentally squirted themselves with glue and said, “I’m really stuck on this job.”
The plumber always doubles-checks their work – they have a tight seal on quality control.
Plumber’s favorite actor? Keanu Reeves in “The Matrix (Plumbing Edition)”.
The plumber was a master of pipe-speak, but was always faucet to learn more.
Plumber Pick-Up Lines
Is your name Drain? Because you’ve got all my pipes flowing in the right direction.
Are you a plumber? Because you’ve got the tools to fix my broken heart.
Can I borrow your wrench? Because I’m nuts and bolts about you.
Is your faucet leaking? Because you’ve turned my head into a full-blown flood.
If you were a clog, I’d be the snake that comes to clear your pipe.
Are you a pipe fitting? Because you make a perfect match for me.
Can I take you out for coffee? Because I can’t resist the drip of your charm.
Is this a plumbing emergency, or did my heart just skip a beat when I saw you?
Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te.
Are you a high-pressure valve? Because being around you makes my heart race.
Can I be your plumber? Because I’d never leave you with a leaky heart.
I must be a plumber because I can’t resist the urge to flush with excitement when I see you.
Is your name PVC? Because you’re so attractive, you’re making me melt.
I must be a plumber, because I’m instantly attracted to your pipes.
Can I call you my “little plunger”? Because you’ve unclogged my heart.
Are you a sewer line? Because I’m drawn to your deep connection.
If I were a pipe, I’d let you inspect every inch of me.
Can I be your drain stopper? Because I want to make sure you never slip away.
Is your name Overflow? Because I can’t contain my feelings for you.
Can I be your pipefitter? Because I want to make sure we have a tight connection.
Plumber One-Liners
I asked the plumber if I could use their bathroom, but they just flushed my request.
The plumber was feeling uninsPIREd, so they decided to take a shower for ideas.
Did you hear about the plumbing convention? It was a pipe dream come true.
A good plumber knows how to prove they’re “plumb” crazy.
The plumber was feeling pressured, but they knew how to handle it – with a wrench.
Replacing pipes is a plumber’s version of “making connections.”
Some people avoid plumbers, but I say, “Never turn your back on someone who knows their way around a plunger.”
Plumbers don’t need social media – they’re already experts at “drain-age.
The secret to a long-lasting relationship? A solid plumber who can fix any issues that arise.
The plumber found a leak but couldn’t fix it. It was a real “drip-et disappointment.”
The plumber’s motto: “Keep calm and carry a pipe wrench.”
A good plumber can “flush” out the problems in your life.
I keep a plunger in my bathroom as a reminder to always push through the tough times.
A plumber’s favorite song? “Dancing in the Shower.”
Pro tip: Don’t trust a plumber who never cracks a smile – they might have a leaky sense of humor.
The plumber told me a water-based joke, but it went over my head like a faucet.
A plumber’s dream car? A “Pipe-rari.”
Remember, plumbers can fix your pipes, but they can’t fix your relationship.
The plumber told me they had a lot on their plate, but I think they meant “under the sink.”
Plumbing advice from a wise plumber: “Don’t sweat the small drips.
Short Plumber Jokes
I hired a plumber to fix my sink, but he just kept tap-dancing around the issue.
Why did the plumber bring a ladder to the party? They heard it was a sink or swim event.
What did the plumber say to the leaky pipe? “Stop dripping and come to your senses!”
Did you hear about the plumber who became an actor? He couldn’t stop playing plumbers in every movie. He was type-cast.
Why did the plumber become an artist? Because they always knew how to draw the right connections.
A plumber walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, “Is this a pipe dream?”
Why was the plumber always singing? Because they had a good pipe-line to harmonize with.
What’s a plumber’s favorite type of music? Pipe-organ tunes.
Why did the plumber flush the clock down the toilet? They wanted to see time go down the drain.
Why did the plumber carry a briefcase? Because they wanted to be a “pipe-liner” business person.
What’s a plumber’s favorite superhero? The Leaktastic Four.
Why was the plumber always so well-liked? They knew how to drain the tension from any situation.
What did the plumber say to their assistant? “I need you to pipe down and focus on the job.”
Why did the plumber bring a fishing rod to work? They wanted to catch a water-main attraction.
What did the plumber say to the faucet? “I’m turning you off because you’re DRIP-ressing me.”
Did you hear about the plumber who wanted to run for office? They promised to fix the “plumb-ic” infrastructure.
Why did the plumber give up on their dream of becoming a comedian? They couldn’t handle the pressure of all the “plumb-tastic” jokes.
Why did the toilet roll go to the plumber’s party? It wanted to unwind and have a “plumb-ing” good time.
What did the plumber wear to bed? Plumber-jamas.
Why did the plumber prefer being underwater? They liked to take the plunge and see things from a different perspective.