I am not a martial arts expert. I have no top secret tips to give you about karate training, let alone what it takes to become a black belt.
If I did, I’d have my own show on the History Channel by now, just like my childhood hero, Chuck Norris. But what I do have are 50 karate jokes for you to enjoy. So if you’re looking for some karate humor to kick off the weekend with, look no further.
Karate Jokes
Why did the karate student bring a ladder to class? Because they wanted to reach new heights in their high kicks.
How does a karate master start their day? With a roundhouse cup of tea.
Why did the karate instructor open a bakery? Because they kneaded dough, just like they knead opponents in the dojo.
What do you call a karate master who’s always hungry? A “munch-ito”.
Why was the karate tournament held in a library? So participants could master their “quiet punches”.
How do karate students greet each other? With a “Hi-yah” and then a friendly wave.
What did the karate teacher say to the hot-headed student? “Cool it, your temper is doing a roundhouse kick”.
Did you hear about the karate student who always loses their car keys? They keep “chop-blocking” themselves.
Why did the karate black belt go to the bank? To roundhouse kick their bank balance into shape.
What’s a karate master’s favorite drink? Punch! No, not the kind with fruit, the one they serve in a cup.
Why did the karate student bring a ladder to the karaoke party? They wanted to reach new “high notes”.
What do you call a group of karate masters playing hide and seek? Nin-jas.
Why don’t karate students ever make good comedians? Because their punchlines are always a bit too literal.
What did the karate instructor say when their student broke a board on their first try? Well, guess we’ll have to work on your aim.
How do karate students keep their energy up in class? With plenty of “high-karate” snacks.
Karate Puns
I tried doing a roundhouse kick on my alarm clock, but it just hit snooze. I guess it’s unbeatable – a black-belt alarm.
Why did the karate teacher open a bakery? Because they kneaded dough and loved to break bread.
A karate master opened a sushi restaurant called “Chop Suey Karate.” Their rolls are really a hit.
Why did the karate student start a gardening business? Because they have a green belt in lawn mowing.
I told my karate instructor that I broke my arm. He replied, “Don’t worry, I’m well-trained in arm-bars.”
What did the karate student say when given a slice of cake? “Let me show you my cake-hicks.”
There was a karate master who loved to travel. He always packed his bags with a kick.
I met a karate expert who was also a hairstylist. They gave me a roundhouse cut.
Why do karate masters make great pastry chefs? They can always deliver a “sweet hit.”
When the karate teacher went on vacation, the students said they had a “sensei-tional” time in class.
Why did the karate student become an artist? Because they wanted to master the art of “chop”sticks.
The karate master quit their day job to open a shoe store. Now they specialize in “sole-ful” kicks.
I accidentally spilled coffee on my sensei’s uniform. She wasn’t mad, she called it a “brewtal” accident.
What did the karate teacher say to the lazy student? “Don’t worry, I’ll kick you into shape.”
Why did the karate student bring a ladder? Because they wanted to “rise” above their competition.
Karate Pick-Up Lines
Are you a black belt in karate? Because you just took my breath away with that high kick!
Is it just me, or do we have some serious chemistry? It’s like we’re a perfect “match”!
I must be channeling my inner karate master, because I feel like I need to sweep you off your feet.
Do you want to practice some moves together later? I think we make a great team.
You don’t have to be a martial arts expert to know that we have some serious “fighting chemistry” here.
I bet you’re flexible like a ninja. Want to show me your moves?
I don’t just admire your karate skills, I also appreciate your beauty and grace. You’re a true warrior princess.
I’m convinced that your heart is as strong as your iron fists. Will you let me get to know the real you?
Do you believe in love at first punch? Because I think we just had a “knockout” first meeting.
I’m not a karate master, but I’m good at making people smile. Can I take you out for a cup of tea?
Your moves are sharp enough to cut diamonds, but it’s your smile that has me hooked. Want to grab dinner sometime?
I hope this isn’t too forward, but would you be interested in sparring with me? I need an opponent as skilled as you are.
I know I’m not a martial arts legend, but would you at least consider being my karate partner for life?
I don’t usually make the first move, but my gut tells me that you’re worth fighting for.
You’re the kind of woman who could make a “wax on, wax off” joke and have me laughing for hours. Want to give it a try?
Are you a black belt in karate? Because you just took my breath away with that high kick.
I must be channeling my inner karate master, because I feel like I need to sweep you off your feet.
I bet you’re flexible like a ninja. Want to show me your moves?
Your moves are sharp enough to cut diamonds, but it’s your smile that has me hooked. Want to grab dinner sometime?
I don’t usually make the first move, but my gut tells me that you’re worth fighting for.