80 Jokes about Hearts

The heart is a vital organ responsible for pumping blood throughout the body, supplying oxygen and nutrients to the tissues.

Lets have a heart-ful of laughter with these pun-tastic delights! From cardiovascular chuckles to pulse-raising wordplay, we’ve compiled 80 puns that are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Heart Puns

My friend asked me why I love puns about hearts so much. I told them, “I guess you could say it’s a-card-iac arrest.”

What do you call a love-struck heart that’s also good with a bow and arrow? A heart-cher.

Why are heart puns the best? They really have a lot of heartfelt meaning.

I told my crush that I have a “card-iac” arrest every time I see them. They thought it was heartwarming.

Did you hear about the heart that played the guitar? It had some serious “heartstrings” talent.

Why did the heart go to medical school? It wanted to learn all about cardiovascular pun-damentals.

What did the heart say to the lungs during a workout? “We make a great cardio team.”

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, so don’t hold back and give it your “wholehearted” effort.

What did one heart say to the other during a romantic dinner? “You really “heart” my appetite.”

Why did the heart start a band? It wanted to spread the rhythm and “heart-beat” to everyone.

I’ve been feeling a bit “hearty” lately. Maybe I’ve just been pumping with love.

Why do hearts make good detectives? They always “follow their heart” and solve mysteries.

I just can’t “artery” believe how much love I have for these heart puns.

My heart was stolen by a thief, but it’s okay because they left a note saying, “You stole my heart first.”

What did the heart say when it found its perfect match? It “beats” being single any day.

Why did the heart decide to become a baker? It knew that every recipe needed a little extra “love”.

I told my heart that it needs to stay strong, even on tough days. After all, it’s got the “heart-itude” of a champion.

What do you call a heart surgeon with a great sense of humor? A “cardiac wit-ologist”.

My heart has a special talent for rhythm. Whenever I listen to music, I can feel it “heart-tapping” along.

Why did the heart refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to be called a “cardi-ace”.

Heart Pick-Up Lines

Are you a magician? Because whenever I see you, my heart disappears.

Is your name Google? Because you have everything my heart has been searching for.

Are you a cardiologist? Because every time I see you, my heart skips a beat.

Is your dad a baker? Because you’re the sweetest thing my heart has ever tasted.

Can I take a picture of you? I want to show my heart what true love looks like.

Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw and my heart.

Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you, and my heart needs some mending too.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again and give your heart another chance?

Is your name Netflix? Because my heart could binge-watch you all day long.

Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got “fine” written all over you and my heart can’t resist.

Can I follow you home? Because my heart always gravitates towards you.

Is your dad an artist? Because you’re a masterpiece that my heart can’t stop admiring.

Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in the beauty of your heart.

Can you hold my hand? I want to be able to tell my heart that I’ve finally found the one.

Do you have a name, or can I call you “mine”? Because it seems like my heart has already claimed you.

Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw, my heart, and the line between flirting and falling in love.

Is your name WiFi? Because I’m really feeling a connection with your heart.

Can I borrow your phone? I need to call my heart and let it know that I’ve found its missing beat.

Excuse me, but I think you owe me a drink. When I looked at you, my heart skipped a few and my knees went weak.

Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, my heart smiles.

Heart One-Liners

Heart One-Liners

Relationships work best when you put your heart into it, not just emojis.

Love is like a puzzle, and sometimes you just have to follow your heart to find the missing pieces.

The heart is the only organ that can love and break at the same time.

Some hearts are wild and free, while others are loyal and steady – it takes all kinds to make the world beat.

From friendships to romances, the heart knows no boundaries when it comes to love.

Never underestimate the power of a kind heart – it can turn the world around.

The heart is like a garden; it flourishes when tended to with love, care, and compassion.

A smile can brighten someone’s day, but a warm heart can light up the world.

The heart has its own language, and sometimes it speaks louder than words.

True strength comes from having a resilient heart that can bounce back from life’s trials.

Love is a journey where two hearts navigate through the twists and turns of life together.

We may not be perfect, but our hearts have the capacity to love and forgive unconditionally.

The heart is where memories reside, and it holds the power to make them last forever.

Love is like a boomerang; it always finds its way back to the heart that sent it.

The heart is a compass that guides us through life’s adventures, pointing us in the direction of love.

Sometimes the smallest acts of kindness can touch the heart in the most profound ways.

Love is like music; it fills the heart with melodies that words alone cannot express.

The heart is like a mirror; it reflects the love we give, allowing it to multiply and shine.

A broken heart doesn’t mean the end; it means there’s room for a stronger, more resilient heart to emerge.

The heart is a storyteller, sharing the tales of love, loss, and resilience that shape us into who we are.

Short Heart Jokes

Why did the heart go to school? It wanted to learn how to count its beats.

How does the heart break up with its significant other? It says, “I don’t have the c(l)ardiac to be with you anymore.”

What did the heart say to the brain at the party? “I’m pumping to the beat, but you’re just overthinking it.”

How did the heart become a successful comedian? It had a lot of heart-felt punchlines.

What marathon did the heart participate in? The “Cardio-thon” – it was a real heart-pumping experience.

Why did the heart go to the doctor? It was feeling a little heartburn – it needed some anta-heart-ids.

What did one heart say to the other when they played tennis? “I love when we have a heart-to-heart match.”

What do you call a heart that wants to be a musician? An “art-ery” – it’s got a lot of rhythm.

What did the heart say when it found out it won an award? “You’re giving me a lot of “heart-turner” with this recognition.”

Why did the heart start a vegetable garden? It wanted to “beet” the competition in living a healthy lifestyle.

What’s a heart’s favorite type of dessert? A “heart-attack cake” – it’s literally to die for.

What did one heart say to the other when they met for coffee? You’re brewing up a latte of love in my ventricle.

What did the heart say to the brain after solving a complex problem? “I couldn’t have done it without your “cardi-a(c)tivity”.”

Why did the heart skip the dance party? It didn’t want to “pump up the volume” and lose its rhythm.

What did one heart say to the other during a game of poker? “I’m all in, and I’m trusting that you won’t break my “cardiac”.”

Why did the heart start a fashion blog? It wanted to create “aorta-worthy” outfits that would make everyone’s heart skip a beat.

How did the heart navigate through town? It followed the “coronary” – it’s the quickest way to the center of everything.

What did one heart say to the other before a big exam? “Heart, don’t fail me now – we’ve got this.”

Why did the heart start training at the gym? It wanted to get “cardio-vascular” fit.

What’s a heart’s favorite type of workout? Cardio, of course – it loves a good heart-pumping session.

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