From the gyoza trays of Japan to the hoppin’ john bowls of the South, food is serious business and a rich source of puns — and I’m not talking “chow mein.
Food jokes inspired these pun-tastic dad jokes. Dad jokes are corny. If you can’t handle their cheese-itude then you might just be a Gruyere! Pop some corn, finish off that wine and enjoy the hilarity.
Funny Food Dad Jokes
Did you hear about the tomato who couldn’t find his way home? He took the “detour” sauce.
I asked the vegetable if he wanted to hear a joke, but he said he already knew all the “corn-y” ones.
My wife asked me to make a salad, so I tossed a bag of money into the air. She said, “What are you doing?” I replied, “Making it rain-couver.”
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little “wine.
I told my wife I wanted to eat my meal in alphabetical order. She said, “What about the condiments?” I said, “Relish, I’ll ketchup with them later.
I walked into a seafood restaurant and asked the waiter if they served lobster. He said, “Sorry, sir, once they’re here, we don’t let them leave.”
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up.
How do you organize a space party? You just “planet”.
I asked the baker if he could make me a cake shaped like a violin. He said, “Sure, but it may sound a bit flat.
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I’ll let you know which comes first.
I went to a seafood disco last night and pulled a mussel.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a big hug.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
Why don’t melons get married? Because they can’t elope.
I asked my dog if she wanted to hear a food joke. She said, “Sure, but make it snappy, I’m starving!” So I said, “Alright, time to stop “pug-geth” and start “pug-chewing”.”
My friend tried to scare me with dough, but I wasn’t afraid. I said, “Don’t worry, I can handle anything that’s a little “dough-st”.”
I was going to tell you a joke about pizza, but it was a bit cheesy.
Funny Food Dad Jokes Pick-Up Lines
Are you a cookie? Because you’re making my heart crumble.
Are you a cup of coffee? Because you’re keeping me up all night.
Are you a vegetable garden? Because I’m feeling a little turnip for you.
Is your name Honeydew? Because I want to be the apple to your eye.
Are you a banana? Because I find you very a-peeling.
Are you a fondue pot? Because I could dip into you all night.
Is your name Nutella? Because I want to spread you on everything.
Are you a sandwich? Because you’re the best thing since sliced bread.
Are you a biscuit from KFC? Because I want to savor you to every last crumb.
Do you have a Mexican restaurant? Because you’re giving me some serious quesadilla.
Is your name Dijon mustard? Because you’re making my hot dog stand out.
Are you a fruit basket? Because you’re sweet and filled with variety.
Is your name Alfredo? Because you’re a total sauce boss.
Are you tofu? Because you’re a food I never knew I needed.
Is your name Oreo? Because I can’t stop after just one bite.
Are you a restaurant? Because I’m pretty sure I want to order everything off your menu.
Are you a salad? Because I can’t get enough of you.
Do you have a bakery? Because I can’t get enough of your buns.
Are you a pizza? Because I’m going to need a whole extra-large, with extra you.
Is your name Cinnamon? Because you spice up my life.
Food Dad Jokes One-liners
I asked the bakery if they made donuts. They said, “We doughnut disappoint.”
I told my wife her cooking was unbalanced. She replied, “Don’t be saucy.”
I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
I asked the butcher if he could recommend a good cut of beef. He said, “That’s a rare opportunity.”
I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a waist of time.
I asked the fruit stand if they had any oranges. They said, “No, just the ones you “peeled” earlier.”
I used to work in a blanket factory, but I couldn’t make enough “ends” meet.
I made a salad dressing joke, but it went right over their heads.
I asked the cheese if it wanted to hear a joke. It said, “I’m all ears.
I tried to catch a fish with my bare hands, but all I got was a round of applause from the other fisherman.
I tried to make an apple pie from scratch, but I couldn’t find the recipe for “scratch”.
I asked the chef what his secret was to making delicious dishes. He said, “It’s all about the seasoning of thyme.”
I asked the potato if it wanted to dance, but it said it was too “mashed” to move.
I asked the vegetable garden for dating advice. They said, “Just “lettuce” help you find your perfect match.
I tried to make a corn joke, but it was too corny for me to handle.
I asked the coffee if it wanted to go for a jog. It said, “I’m already “espresso”ing myself enough.”
I told my wife I wanted to eat my meal in reverse order. She said, “You’re starting this dinner off on the wrong “foot”.
I asked the watermelon if it wanted to go to the beach. It said, “I’m already “melon” a good time right here.”
I tried to make a joke about pasta, but it kept “spiraling” out of control.
I asked the doughnut how it was feeling. It said, “I’m “glazed” and confused.”
Short Funny Food Dad Jokes
Did you hear about the carrot who became a comedian? He really knows how to “crunch” the jokes.
I tried to make a bread pun, but it wasn’t my “loaf” of expertise.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
I got fired from my job at the donut factory. I just couldn’t “glaze” over my mistakes.
What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi.
I ate a clock once. It was very time-consuming.
I wanted to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
I asked the fruit salad if it wanted to go on a date. It said, “I’m already in a “peeling” relationship.”
I asked the vegetable garden for advice. It said, “Just “lettuce” help you.”
I tried to make a taco joke, but it got too “cheesy” for my taste.
I went to the seafood disco and pulled a mussel.
I asked the butter if it wanted to go on a trip. It said, “I’m on a “roll” already.”
I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
I asked my dog if he wanted a slice of pizza. He said, “No thanks, I’m on a no-carb diet.”
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because it was outstanding in its field.
I asked the orange if it wanted to hear a joke. It said, “Peel free to share.”
I tried to make a vegetable pun, but it didn’t “produce” the desired laughs.
I went to the farmer’s market and asked for a tree. They said, “Sorry, we only sell produce.”
I tried to make a joke about sausages, but it didn’t have enough “links” to be funny.
Why did the chef get arrested? For beating an egg.
Also Read – Food Jokes for Kids